Uncle Grumpy has been observing the press and pundit coverage of the presidential campaign and in particular the published reactions to the selection of Sarah Palin by John McCain as his pick for a Vice Presidential running mate.
It suddenly seems to me that I must be living in a surreal dream. I thought–and I’m willing to admit that it has been some time since I took a civics course–but I thought that we the people of the United States were in the midst of the democratic process of choosing the most suitable individual to serve as our leader for the next four years. I’ve seen now that I’m wrong, and likely have been for some time. No wonder that in the 9 presidential elections I’ve participated in so far the only time I voted for the winner was when I voted for Bill Clinton in 1996.
Based on my admittedly biased survey of news articles, editorials, and commentaries related to the campaign, at least 80% are about the election, and fewer than 20% are even obliquely related to the substantive qualifications of the candidates. The press coverage, I’m sorry to say is not all that different from ESPN’s coverage of the NASCAR Sprint for the Cup. It’s a high stakes race and the candidates are pulling out all the stops.
Here’s a list of campaign related topics that have been in the news lately:
- Mr. Obama’s exceptional abilities as a public speaker. This is seemingly a bad talent for a candidate to have because it probably hides some unspecified evil within.
- The number of Mr. McCain’s houses. My conclusion is that Mr. McCain probably has as many houses as I have shirts, since like McCain and his houses, I don’t really know how many shirts I have, although unlike McCain, I can’t afford a staff to blame it on.
- Mr. Obama’s age.
- Mr. McCain’s age.
- Mr. Obama’s wife’s exceptional abilities as a public speaker. I’ve learned that this is even a worse handicap for a candidate than being able to speak well himself.
- The kinds of ads that Mr. Obama has been running.
- The kinds of ads that Mr. McCain has been running to counter the kinds of ads that Mr. Obama is running.
- Mr. Obama’s ineptness at bowling. I even caught some enlightening film of that and sent Mr. Obama a hopefully helpful note advising him to either put more hook on the ball or use a mark closer to the center of the lane. I also seem to recall vaguely that Mr. Nixon had the bowling lanes removed from the White House about 30 years ago which would seem to make this whole issue moot.
- Mrs. Obama’s style. The article I read was either for it or against it, I couldn’t tell for sure.
- The cost of the Democratic convention, with special attention on how expensive it was to dress up MIle High Stadium. (Sorry Invesco, whoever you are, but you just don’t have a name worthy of a football stadium.)
- The unprecedented amount of money Mr. Obama has been raising.
- The unprecedented amount of money Mr. McCain has not been raising. So much for the theory that the Republicans are the party of the rich.
Unless a candidate is suggesting that in lieu of more taxes, the President will personally get on the phone a do some arm twisting with potential sponsors of public works projects, none of this has very much to do with which candidate will make the best president, but all of it has a lot to do with guessing who will actually be elected president. Which brings us back to Ms. Palin.
So far I’ve read about her second place finish in a Miss Alaska contest, black gogo boots, weird kids names, being a Conservative Christian, and wearing her hair up in an attempt to make herself look frumpy (her words there, not mine). I’ve also seen a lot of discussion about how this will seal the deal for McCain, the deal here being either Mr. McCain’s victory in November or his defeat, depending on what you’re reading.
But so far I have seen no one say in plain English, “There is no way in hell that this woman is qualified to be President of the United States.” Hello, being qualified has to count for something doesn’t it? If all 200 million or so who are legally qualified to be President were lined up in the order of our suitability for the job with George Bush standing in front of the White House, Ms. Palin would be somewhere just the other side of the Mississippi River. (Whoever is actually most suited for the presidency would probably be somewhere in Maine, but that’s a whole different matter.)
Then it occurred to me, boing, I’ve been missing the point. It’s why there’s a two week gap between the Conference Finals and the Super Bowl. Election day itself is almost an after thought–the only practical way to close out all those bets made over the past 12 months. The real excitement is in the chase. This is not a selection process, it’s a contest, or as we call it, a race. It’s a high school popularity contest run amok, with tens of millions of dollars in the kitty. It’s American Idol, with the whole world watching.
Nobody really wants to try to understand the economic theory behind high/low taxes for the rich/middle class. People don’t want to try to talk to their friends about the priority of fixing the health care system versus better educational opportunities for poor children. Man that’s complicated, and some people actually care which just gets them all excited, and they could even end up not liking you if you said the wrong thing.
What the people want from the news entertainment business is gossip, scandal, and nasty rumors that some poor fool has to get up and deny only to come back and admit to a week later. Now that’s interesting. People don’t want to vote for some smarty pants who really does know all the answers, they want to vote for somebody who sounds like the guy sitting next to them at the bar. Hence the concept, “He’s the kind of guy I could have a beer with.”
And Ms. Palin, well so what if she’s not actually qualified? She’s stirred things up, renewed interest, gave the sound byte prospectors something write, talk, speculate about without the need for a deep understanding of any substantive background material.
Perfect.